Final Fantasy XIII

Sparkles wrote:FFXII was a huge disappointment. Any game whose only selling point is the fact that I want to have a threeway with two of the characters is a game that's definitely doing something wrong. I mean, under normal circumstances I would love Ashe (you know, my having a penis and all), but despite the fact that she puts a new definition to 'mini-skirt', her character is so deplorably bitchy that I have a hard time getting it up.

My standards aren't going to be high for this game. I've definitely begun to lose hope with the series. Then again, I could be pleasantly surprised by the quality of this/these games(s), but I'm not going to even bother holding my breath.

Also, if I didn't have a nasty, finger-print laden black hole that did everything that Sony's new creamy goddess does, I would be all over the new PS3. 'Cause that thing looks damn sexy. White's totally the new black.

Cloud wrote:Not sure if the last paragraph is referencing the PS3 Slim, PSP Go (God forbid) or a prostitute that a pimp named Sony sends out.

The whole game is completely linear until halfway through [approximately 20 hours].
There are hardly any towns.
The party is always fixed. The whole game just repeats the movie-battle sequence over and over [In fact the progression is closer to movie-run-battle-run-movie-boss-movie-run-battle…].
There are rather a lot of movies.
Moving around is like a long marathon.
The whole game system is just a clone of FF10.
You can’t flee battles [You can’t avoid most battles either as there is no sneaking past enemies, including weak ones].
Your party is completely healed after each battle.
If the main character in your party dies it is game over [There are only ever 3 characters in battle, often less, and often fixed].
The best tactic is almost always endlessly attacking. There is next to no strategy or skill involved.
The summons’ transformation scenes are a joke [i.e. Odin turning into a horse].
The story is rubbish… [Spoilers omitted, but complaints centre on Snow’s constant and cringe inducing insistence that he is a hero and will “protect” whatever it is the antagonists are menacing this time]
Shopping is only done at “online” shops on save points, with no proper shops to be found.
However, this doesn’t matter as you hardly ever get any money [and you can never buy anything more powerful than what you already looted].
There have been next to no changes from the demo.
The status screen displays no real information.
There are only 8 items usable in combat [For that matter, there are hardly any weapons or accessories, and the “crafting” system mostly consists of spending drops to upgrade their 2 stats].
There are no levels.
With all their advertising money, just how was it they failed even to get Famitsu to give full points?