Rules/Reflections on Art School.

A recent discussion I had with my friend Katie and some issues she was having prompted me to write this. I think two years out of school I can say a few of these things. Some collected experiences and advice for those going to/in art school:

(Whoever comes across this, please add to this!)

1. Coffee < Drinking. The best decisions you will make creatively will be those made while getting hammered. My reasoning behind this is simple, Coffee = Paranoia & Drinking = Fearlessness. And we all need to be fearless when making art. Additionally, as I will touch on later, drinking has a guarantee that you will get some sleep at some point, albeit not always in the best place. I’ve stayed up for days caffeinated and ruined work that it took one night of whiskey to fix, so tip back a few cocktails and get to it.

2. Mentors. Find them. Get their attention. Pull from them everything you can. Everyone needs a mentor, someone who excites them and is a constant push. It would be a challenge to find any artist who did not have one. Except Warhol, but he is an asshole.

3. Mentoring. When you start out, the upperclassmen will be those assholes that occasionally encourage you but you will hate them for their superiority. As an upperclassmen, you will wonder why all these freshman fucking hate you. This will always happen this exact way, but don’t give up on the system. Remember that when you stayed up for days making that little lumpy piece of crap and your professor tore you apart, it was probably one of those upperclassmen that patted you on the back afterwards and told you about your potential. And you probably cried.

4. Passage.
Freshman - You are cocky, assured and going to prove all those pricks wrong!
Sophomore - Deeply depressed and stressed, plus no one else ‘gets it’.
Junior - You’re 21! you will spend this year drunk and it will be your greatest year of college.
*End of Junior Year - Alcohol fueled depression.
Senior Year - You are that nerd that works on Friday nights and keeps a datebook.

5. Business Classes. Just take them. If nothing else it buys you four years of your parents leaving you alone. They are dull, and yes employers do appreciate you having taken them.

6. Graphic Design. If you have not already taken a GD class, take one. I have used the skills I learned more out of school than any other class I took in school. Watch some clips of Don Draper and/or the movie Helvetica if you need help getting excited about it.

7. Criticism. If no one is tearing your work apart, it means that no one cares. Better to be notorious than accepted.

8. Leaving the Building. Do you hang out after work at your jobs? Hell no! you are out the door as soon as that shift is done! Treat school like a job, not doing so was my biggest mistake. Do not sleep there! Do not take breaks there! Do not eat there! Do not take breaks there! Do not attempt to shower there! Do not take breaks there! You productivity will more than double and you won’t feel like vomiting whenever you enter the building years later.

9. Those Feelings of Doubt/Worthlessness. Never goes away. Read the book Art & Fear and move on. Warhol never felt he was worthless, but he’s an asshole.

10. The Women. Are going to be the hottest on campus. Likewise they will also have the most severe psychological issues on campus.

11. The Men. Egotistical. Basically a walking penis with skinny jeans and ironically clever facial hair.

12. Smoking. Everyone will tell you not to start smoking in Art School. You will anyway. When you graduate smoking 30 rolled cigarettes a day, clothes that come out the wash smelling like an ashtray, and hacking phlegm constantly, maybe you will understand why. You’ll start smoking anyway.

13. Hard work. This will get you everywhere. If you are starting out, watch those lazy talented kids fall to the wayside as the years go on. It is the secret and the only secret to being a great artist. No one got ahead on talent alone and not putting honest work in themselves. Well, Warhol did, but he’s an asshole.

14. Art History. My Favorite subject, I still read art history in my free time. This was also the best naps I had in all of college.

15. Art Education Majors. Are the classes retarded? Yes. Will you be the only one hired straight out of school into a job with decent pay, benefits, and security. Yes. If you want to do it, don’t let your peers convince you otherwise.

16. Senior Show. This without a doubt will be the most work you ever put into anything in your life that will get you absolutely no money. It will also be the proudest moment of you life, because you will win hard earned respect. And no one can fucking touch that.

17. The Actual Work Itself. You will hate all of it, forever. But never under any circumstance throw it out. Years from now you will know why.

18. Answering Non-Art Majors Life Questions. Why did you go to art school (condecending tone) for? What kind of job are you going to get? Isn’t that a waste of money? In my experience these questions serve one purpose and one purpose alone, to validate the experiences of those asking them. These pricks will always ask you this and the point is always the same, they want to show off/feel better about themselves. Shrug it off, it will piss them off more than anything.

19. Peers. Love them, but treat the social experience like you’re on the show Survivor. You will all be friends again a few years after you graduate anyway.

20. Sleep. You need it. Get it. You will work slower tired than you will refreshed from a nice nap.

21. Peers (2). This one comes from my Dad. Always remember that no matter how much
older someone is than you, it does not mean they have their shit together. Always take advice from elders with a grain of salt.

22. Graduation/Engagement. It’s a bad idea. It’s cool to be the first among your friends married. It is the worst to be first divorced. Give it a few years first.

23. Do What You Wanna. The greatest mistake is to take it all too seriously. Get drunk, fuck a lot, and make great art. This is the only thing Warhol did well.

ync wrote:

and mego - i agree with you on the helvetica movie, HOLY SHIT boring, i wanted to dieeeeeee